The Misadventures of The Machine's Daughter
by ashleybelle
Summary: alternate universe, kane/lita pairing, eventual oc/tbd pairing, see disclaimers inside. Heaven Jacobs grew up as a ring rat with both of her parents in the WWE. Now she's 21 and she's got her sights set on becoming a Diva. What misadventures will she get into? Plenty, if you keep reading.
1. Disclaimers

**NOTES DISCLAIMERS & IMPORTANT INFORMATION **

**READ BELOW**

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Okay, I realize this could not be logical, therefore, this of course, is an alternate universe fanfiction featuring my favorite pairing, Kane and Lita. It's based on a what if I had, from their whole Unholy Union kayfabe. . What if their child survived?

While I realize going into this that it's mathematically impossible, I have created a work around so that I can still pair the daughter, Heaven, at some point.. For the sake of this fanfiction, Kane and Lita were dating since **before** Lita came to the WWE, and split up for a short period of time when she became a member of Team Xtreme.

They **already had** Heaven, their daughter. By the time the whole kayfabe with Kane/Lita/Matt took place, she was probably in her early teens since in the fanfiction, I have her as being 21. I'm posting this before the story to keep anyone from "pointing out" that it is not logical.

With my above work around, it is possible. Just enjoy the story, 'kay?

Warnings: heavy swearing, some violence, eventual sex, awkward situations and some downright cattiness on the part of divas.

Setting: 2012, might have some mentions of ingoing kayfabes, but I'm also going to make up a few of my own.

Pairing choices: I'm torn between Daniel Bryan and Jack Swagger, maybe Randy Orton or Sheamus, Cody Rhodes.

For now, that's all. If anything changes, consult this page. I'll add and post notices as needed on here.


	2. Mother Daughter Bonds

** : CHAPTER ONE :**

**_"CHAOS IS NEVER A BAD THING"_  
**

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Lita looked at her 21 year old daughter and bit her lip, studying the outfit. "But black.. Are you SURE you want to wear black?" she asked as she knit her brows together. Not only was her daughter competing in NXT.. But Lita was her mentor, she'd pulled some strings to make this happen.

"Mom. I'm sure." Heaven said calmly as she bit her lip and smirking said "Besides. There's a nutjob in every batch of rookies.. I figured I might as well be that girl in this one. Since the rest of the bimbos only share one brain cell collectively."

Lita snickered and lightly punched her daughter on the arm as she handed her the black elbow length fishnet fingerless gloves and whispered, "Be nice, baby girl. At least try.."

"Mom.. Are we forgetting I'm not really a nice girl?" Heaven asked as Lita hugged her daughter one last time and then said "Okay.. Hey, before you go. The necklace."

She hooked the sterling silver shooting star necklace that Glenn had given her the week after they'd met as a surprise around her 21 year old daughter's neck and Heaven pulled up the hood on her black sleeveless trench coat. "See you out there, Mom." Heaven said as Lita watched her daughter walking down the ring to her entrance theme, Monster.

Glenn walked over and then said "She's got the fighting part, Lita, don't worry. She's good, we helped her train."

Lita looked up at her husband and asked nervously, "Yeah babe, but maybe we shouldn't have let her do this? Maybe we should have made her go to that art school instead? I mean comic book artists don't get hurt like wrestlers do, Glenn and that's my baby out there."

Glenn ruffled his wife's hair as AJ walked over and said " I just wanted to tell Lita that Heaven's in good hands. We will not make her do anything she doesn't want to do, kayfabe wise."

Lita smiled and then said "Well, I should be getting out there, to the rest of the judges." and giving Glenn one last kiss, she walked down, took her seat on the ramp with the other female judges, waving at her daughter, who smiled and mouthed, "Home Team.", an inside joke, and a reference to the shared mother daughter weakness that both women posessed for the Rocky Balboa series.

"Home Team, little monster." Lita muttered as she waved, dared to blow a kiss to her daughter before the cameras panned in on them one more time.

Vickie leaned in and said "Your daughter doesn't stand a chance in hell, Dumas. I have Jen and she's the best rookie I've ever gotten. She WILL win."

Lita rolled her eyes dismissively and then leaning in said "She might have the tits, the ass, and the brain cell requirement.. But my daughter has the skill and the talent. Not to mention she's a lot wilder than you idiots think and it takes a wild card to make it in this competition."

Vickie growled and turned her attention to her own rookie for the moment, leaving Lita to drift in and out of her own thoughts for a while and watch her daughter in that ring, smiling proudly. She felt her cell phone buzz halfway through and smiled realizing Kane was hidden, watching too.


	3. Its About To Be A Girlfight

** : CHAPTER TWO :**

**_"ITS ABOUT TO BE A GIRLFIGHT"_  
**

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_'In case you missed it, during the break, we had the kick off of our rookies matches. Currently, we have Heaven Jacobs against Jen Solerno. And this is what went down.' _Michael Cole said from ringside, as he continued to watch the chaos inside the ring.

"Bitch."

"Slut."

"Blow up doll."

"Your mom is a whore."

Those words, the second they left Jen's mouth, sealed her fate. Before she even fully realized what was going on, she was speared and on her back on the floor as the petite daughter of Kane and Lita hovered over her, a sadistic smile on her face, her foot raised.

She bought her foot down into the girls midsection as she snarled, " My mother is NOT a whore." and kicked her once or twice in the midsection. Jen tried to stand, and dizzily, she grabbed a hand full of Heaven's long hair, slinging her down, getting her into a LeBell Lock.

Which moments later, Heaven managed to wiggle free from. And then Jen realized running might be a safe bet, because when she'd dared to go there about Lita Dumas, something in the quieter diva had snapped and now, Jen just didn't feel safe.

Running did no good however, Heaven caught her halfway up the ramp and grabbing a handful of the other girls short black hair, she slung her down, snarling and growling, panting as she straddled the girl, punching her in the face, holding her head and slamming it down onto the concrete.

Lita groaned then said quietly, "Damn it all to hell. I've told her a thousand times, those girls and other people backstage are gonna say stuff and she has to have a thicker skin.. She gets this from her father, sadly."

Her cell phone vibrated and she snickered as she saw that Mark, who'd helped them train their daughter had texted and said "Tell her to go for the left shoulder. If you can. And that Uncle Mark loves his little lightning bug."

Lita groaned as she showed Kelly Blank the text and Kelly snickered.

_' A brutal attack by Heaven Jacobs ladies and gentlemen. And it looks like she's not letting up anytime soon.. SPEAR! A Spear by Jen Solerno, I don't know how she did it but she got up.'_

"Should have stayed down you horse humping bitch." Heaven said as she dragged the girl by a handful of hair to the bathrooms backstage, and dunked her head into the toilet, flushing, holding the flusher down with a heavy soled combat boot.

_'It's like the Apocalypse out here, Josh.' _

_'It looks like the ladies have moved it... Oh wow. Is she holding Jen's head in a toilet, Michael?' _

By now, the fight had attracted several of the men in the green room to poke their heads out, watch it, watch the chaos the fight left in it's wake as it spilled up the hallway and wince as Jen busted a glass vase over Heaven's head only to be clumsily tombstoned down into the glass mess seconds later.

The ref did a quick count out and raised Heaven's arms in victory. Heaven took the mic and said " Who's next you pygmy brainless bitches? Which one of my fellow rookies wants to be my next target?"

Lita snickered and then said "Guess that answers my question as to whether she'll wind up a face or a heel." as she pushed through the crowd, and thanked Mark for grabbing Heaven before she went after Jen again, then slid her arm around her daughter's shoulders, as Glenn rushed over and inspected her carefully.

"Dad, I'm totally fine. It's just a little blood, damn.." Heaven muttered -with blood pouring from a small gash in her forehead -as she looked at AJ and with a wink said "It'd be totally awesome if you bought back hardcore matches, they're umm, they're kind of my specialty.." before going limp and being put over her father's shoulder, carried past a small group of shocked and impressed male Superstars.

One of them was CM Punk who turned to Daniel Bryan and mouthed, "Wow.. Remind me NOT to piss her off anytime soon."

Daniel remained silent. He'd been impressed, actually, but knowing her father was Kane, well.. It kind of gave a guy incentive to keep his mouth shut so he could keep his dick intact.


	4. I Do Not Have An Anger Problem

** : CHAPTER THREE :**

**_" I DO NOT HAVE AN ANGER PROBLEM, GOD DAMN IT"_  
**

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_'Tonight, we get to see what you ladies call your talent.' _Matt Stryker said as he held out the mic to Heaven first, and eyed the two sets of boxing gloves on the table in the ring, warily. _'What's your talent?'_

_'Well, Stryker, tonight I'm going to give Michael Cole an opinion of his own that isn't completely stupid. No, I joke, I kid.. My talent is boxing. I've been boxing and doing martial arts since I was 10. I'm gonna need a volunteer.'_ Heaven asked, her lips curving into a seductive yet all the same, a dangerous pout.

Eve's music began to play, and Eve walked down with a self satisfied smirk. The cruel laugh that escaped Heaven's lips next was almost a bone chilling sound as Heaven took the mic and with a hand on her hip said _'In case you missed it, I said my talent was actually fighting. Not pretending to fight. You can go on back to the dressing rooms now, Torres you skanky second rate whore. Are there any SERIOUS volunteers?'_

__Eve kept walking towards the ring. Earlier that night, the two of them had had a little scuffle and it'd resulted in Eve's current black eye. But how was Heaven supposed to have known she wasn't supposed to actually belt someone on camera, should they piss her off?

She didn't.

Now Eve wanted revenge.

Heaven laughed then muttered 'Okay, if she really wants this.' as she tossed the boxing gloves at Eve hard then said "Glove up then you babyback bitch."

The two bumped gloves and Heaven came out swinging. Eve ducked and swung her left hook, as Heaven cut a backwards flip to avoid it.

Backstage, Glenn and Mark were on the edge of their seats, ducking and weaving, throwing punches as if it were them that were in the fight not Eve and Heaven.

The door to the green room opened, and John Cena stood leaned in it. "That your kid, Glenn?"

"Yeah. Don't even think it, Poster Boy." Glenn muttered as Cena put his hands up and said "Nah. I like 'em spicy, but she's a little too spicy for my taste."

Mark saw the tattoo and roared. "Glenn, I thought we told her no damn ink."

Glenn texted his wife and asked when in the hell Heaven got a brass knuckles tattoo on the lower right side of her back.

Lita opened her phone out front and then almost rolled in laughter. "She's in for it when tonight's events are over. Papa bear just saw the tattoo and he is pissed. Both he and Mark told her no ink." Lita explained to Trish who snickered and said "Yeah, and we BOTH told them how that'd go, if she really decided she wanted a tattoo."

"She has always been stubborn as hell." Lita muttered as she sat on stage jabbing and weaving like her daughter was in the ring right now.

The left hook came out of nowhere and Eve went down. The ref counted the match down, and Heaven took back the mic as she smirked and said _'And that, Stryker, isn't my only talent.' _as she winked mysteriously and slid back into her place in line calling out mischeviously, "You okay down there Eve? Oh get up already you drama queen, I didn't even hit you that damn hard."

CM Punk snickered from his seat in the green room. "And again. I say she has an anger problem too."

When he said this, Mark turned to him, smirking coldly as he said calmly, "If you want your teeth in your mouth son.. I'd NEVER screw around and say that to her face. Truth be told, she does have a bit of an anger problem... And she's real touchy about it... Then there's daddy here. He's real protective."

Punk shut up rather quickly for once in his life.

Then the loud arguing from the curtain got everyone in the green room on their feet.

"TAKE IT BACK YOU BITCH!"

"YOURE FUCKING INSANE, ITS FACT"

"I. DO. NOT. HAVE. A . FUCKING. ANGER . PROBLEM ." Heaven spat as Mark said "Aww hell. Glenn you gonna get this one or should I?"

Glenn sighed and stood, shaking his head as the two legends shuffled out of the room towards the fight with the other Superstars hot on their heels.

By the time the two Legends got to the fight, Randy Orton was holding Heaven with her arms pinned and Wade Barrett had his arms on Jen, and the two of them were shouting at one another, taunting one another.

"Keep on, Jen. I can always let Spitfire here go." Randy said with a malicious smirk as Wade growled, "You keep that crazy bitch on a leash or I'll.."

His words were cut off when Glenn tapped him and got him into a choke hold, sneering as he said "You'll what, Barrett?"

Randy snickered and then used the distraction to his advantage, helping the sexy hellion to the backstage area.

"You okay?" he asked with a smirk as Heaven took a few deep breaths and said "I'm good. I just don't get why people keep saying I have an anger problem."

Randy shrugged and raking his hand over his head stated calmly, "Cheer up. You could be sharing your mind with three equally crazy fuckers who like to talk to you."

Heaven poked out her tongue and said "Oh ha, right. You're the one who hears people talking to you. How's that work, exactly.. I mean do they tell you normal stuff or do they want you to plot world domination?"

Randy winked then leaning down said quietly, " I dunno. Get to know me and you'll know the answer to that on your own, Spitfire. See you around." before walking out of the green room, whistling to himself.

If any of those other idiots thought THEY were claiming her? Not a chance in hell. Randy wanted her, and what Randy Orton wanted, he usually got.


End file.
